I was going to let you all know just how much I feel that I am a failure, but in looking at what I was going to talk about I realized that I don't feel like a failure. I am disappointed a bit in how I can not seem to get back on teh weightloss wheel. My mind is so full of metaphors perhaps that is not the right word but I can see myself on that little wheel that the rats run on. It goes round and round and they never goes anywhere-nothing is ever accomplilshed yet, each day the rat jumps on the wheel and runs his little heart out and deja fu never accomplishes anything and the next day he jumps on it again. Wonder if he ever looks at that wheel and asks himself why he is wasting his time. Wonder if he ever looks up and says why bother? Well this big rat does and yet I can't seem to let go of the hope that this day it is going to really go somewhere. Am I lying to myself? I don't like to think that maybe I am just lying about it. I sure do not want to look at my hopes and glance at them with rose colored glasses.
My diet is covered with slippery grease and I try to hold onto it but it just slides away and I really try to hold onto it but it slips out of my grip. Tomorrow I will use spray and wash degreaser so that I can get a better grip on it. lol
Baby is here and I helped him with his homework. He asked again if I was going to yell at him.
His birthday was earlier this month and I gave him a little party here at my house. He was so excited and he accidently hit his daddy. His daddy hit him back hard enough to leave a welt on his legs. I told his daddy he should not have done it and he said "he hit me first" I told him that he was the adult and then he said "and that is MY child" Like what he wanted to do to the baby was ok because it was his child. I want daughter to leave that man so bad. And she was going to leave him and then her husband said he was going too. He is going to move in with her and the baby. My dd really should tell him how she feels but she is so tender hearted that she is letting hem move with her.
I hate it and there is nothing I can do . If I say too much her husband may say that I can't watch him any more. And the way it looks my house is the only stability that baby gets. When baby prays he says everytime God bless mama and grandma and granddaddy and daddy and help daddy not be mean to me," When he blew out the candles on his cake he said his wish "please let daddy stop being mean to me." His daddy heard him and just laughed about it.
Josie HAPPY BIRTHDAY I hope your day was absolutely the best ever, God bless you and keep you safe, and may He give you many many more years.
Deb if I had a wish-I would not wish for wealth or fame or power-I would wish for all the children in the world to have the love and care that is exactly what God had in mind for them. I would wish for hands to hold them and not hurt them and I would wish for the caretakers to be calm and a great example for the children to follow. God bless you and yours
Time to get ready for church.
I posted this on facebook and I like it so much that I wanted to post it here,.
Wednesday, August 24, 2011
Sunday, August 14, 2011
The Lord is my Shepard
I had a most interesting and humbling time with the Lord today. Mostly it comes down to what is my God. It is not an idol that I worship or money that I am willing to commit sins to possess. It is not power or reputation. It is not my husband or my children. So after searching myself, after going over my days, after taking the time to see how I spend my minutes and hours and days, I have realized that while I do love the Lord while I do pray to Him while I do spend time reading the Holy Bible, there is something that I spend more time with.
I spend way too much time on the computer. I would love to be able to say that I don't but honestly I do.
Before I got this computer I did not have one at all, the old one broke and I just did not have another. I was praying more and reading my bible and listening to gospel music. NOW not so much.
My fault and I know it. It just sneaked up on me and now it is what it is. And it is up to me to change. So I am going to cut back a lot on my computer usage. I used the computer for intertainment and to pass the time until it was a habit . If I had a moment I would come to the computer, and that is not what I want.
I will be coming here some just not as much. Goodness even my house has suffered, I noticed that yesterday. dust balls in the corners. Babys movies in here and in there and over there. His cars and his books all over the place.
Keep praying for me, keep praying for daughter and her husband, I will be praying for each of you.
Josie you are a delight to know and I love you like you were my own. I am proud of what you are accomplising right now. I know how hard it is and I take pleasure in your successes. I will keep praying for you
Deb everyday when I open my bible I see a white ladies handkerchief with pink lace that used to be tucked in my grandmoms pocket. I see your name wrote on it and I remember that you need prayer. And I mention the special requests . I lift your names to our Father .
God bless you all
I love you
I spend way too much time on the computer. I would love to be able to say that I don't but honestly I do.
Before I got this computer I did not have one at all, the old one broke and I just did not have another. I was praying more and reading my bible and listening to gospel music. NOW not so much.
My fault and I know it. It just sneaked up on me and now it is what it is. And it is up to me to change. So I am going to cut back a lot on my computer usage. I used the computer for intertainment and to pass the time until it was a habit . If I had a moment I would come to the computer, and that is not what I want.
I will be coming here some just not as much. Goodness even my house has suffered, I noticed that yesterday. dust balls in the corners. Babys movies in here and in there and over there. His cars and his books all over the place.
Keep praying for me, keep praying for daughter and her husband, I will be praying for each of you.
Josie you are a delight to know and I love you like you were my own. I am proud of what you are accomplising right now. I know how hard it is and I take pleasure in your successes. I will keep praying for you
Deb everyday when I open my bible I see a white ladies handkerchief with pink lace that used to be tucked in my grandmoms pocket. I see your name wrote on it and I remember that you need prayer. And I mention the special requests . I lift your names to our Father .
God bless you all
I love you
Sunday, August 7, 2011
Charlotte, please read, I can not post on your blog
praise God for His moving in such a wonderful way-thats our God-He will always be there, He said He would, and He can not, and will not lie to us. His love is beyond compare, He is the master of all things and that includes our frail bodies. I love Him, He has never let me down. I am so happy for you and your husband, and what a wonderful testimony. I pray that your story will touch a heart-change a life-bring a soul to the prescence of the Lord. God bless and keep you and your husband in the palm of His hand.
----------------------------------
Stuff going on here-----
My dd has decided to leave her husband-I hope that is what she means. I know that she is getting a small place for her and baby to live. Her hubby does not like the new place because it is out in the country,even though it is half in rent to what they have been paying. He said he will stay where he is, and will visit over there. He complains about money Now it is in the country but she is renting from her uncles wife (my husbands bother that died some time ago the mobile home belongs to her)DShe is giving them the opportunity to rent to own, at a very reduced price, and she is giving dd furniture and tvs to help furnixh the mobile home, becasue dd is going there with just beds and dresser and chest of drawers. (added later----I removed the comment-I wish I had not even thought it-Thank you Lord for letting me know that it was not something that I should have allowed to form in my mind)
I worked yesterday, we did 3 houses anad and 9 condos. I work with a crew of usually 7 people and you would think we would be falling all over each other but we all have a job to do and we go in and do the job and get out. all togeather there are about 10 crews and this weekend a few crews was fired for slack work. Our crew was given a bonus for exemplary work. Made me feel good. It is so easy to clean a house when you don't have to move around a lived in house, AND when there is when there is so many people doing their work with you. Hard work but pay is pretty good, and I love the people that I am working with. Thank you Lord for providing a job for me.
-------------------
Psalm 9:1.2
I will give thanks to the Lord with my whole heart,I will tell of all your wonderful deeds. I will be glad and exult in you, I will sing praise to your name, O Most High.
DEAR LORD
I AM HAPPY BECAUSE YOU HAVE ACCEPTED ME, DEAR LORD. SOMETIMES I DO NOT KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH ALL MY HAPPINESS
I SWIM IN YOUR GRACE LIKE A WHALE IN THE OCEAN. THE SAYING GOES 'AN OCEAN NEVER DRIES UP' BUT WE KNOW THAT YOUR GRACE ALSO NEVER FAILS. DEAR LORD, YOUR GRACE AND LOVE IS OUR HAPPINESS, HALLEJAH!!!!
------------------------------------
(copied from "MY PERSONAL DAILY PRAYER BOOK")
May God bless each of you
and may our spirits meet each other at the throneroom of God on this wonderful day that the Lord has made just for us.
----------------------------------
Stuff going on here-----
My dd has decided to leave her husband-I hope that is what she means. I know that she is getting a small place for her and baby to live. Her hubby does not like the new place because it is out in the country,even though it is half in rent to what they have been paying. He said he will stay where he is, and will visit over there. He complains about money Now it is in the country but she is renting from her uncles wife (my husbands bother that died some time ago the mobile home belongs to her)DShe is giving them the opportunity to rent to own, at a very reduced price, and she is giving dd furniture and tvs to help furnixh the mobile home, becasue dd is going there with just beds and dresser and chest of drawers. (added later----I removed the comment-I wish I had not even thought it-Thank you Lord for letting me know that it was not something that I should have allowed to form in my mind)
I worked yesterday, we did 3 houses anad and 9 condos. I work with a crew of usually 7 people and you would think we would be falling all over each other but we all have a job to do and we go in and do the job and get out. all togeather there are about 10 crews and this weekend a few crews was fired for slack work. Our crew was given a bonus for exemplary work. Made me feel good. It is so easy to clean a house when you don't have to move around a lived in house, AND when there is when there is so many people doing their work with you. Hard work but pay is pretty good, and I love the people that I am working with. Thank you Lord for providing a job for me.
-------------------
Psalm 9:1.2
I will give thanks to the Lord with my whole heart,I will tell of all your wonderful deeds. I will be glad and exult in you, I will sing praise to your name, O Most High.
DEAR LORD
I AM HAPPY BECAUSE YOU HAVE ACCEPTED ME, DEAR LORD. SOMETIMES I DO NOT KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH ALL MY HAPPINESS
I SWIM IN YOUR GRACE LIKE A WHALE IN THE OCEAN. THE SAYING GOES 'AN OCEAN NEVER DRIES UP' BUT WE KNOW THAT YOUR GRACE ALSO NEVER FAILS. DEAR LORD, YOUR GRACE AND LOVE IS OUR HAPPINESS, HALLEJAH!!!!
------------------------------------
(copied from "MY PERSONAL DAILY PRAYER BOOK")
May God bless each of you
and may our spirits meet each other at the throneroom of God on this wonderful day that the Lord has made just for us.
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